Are you the parent of a child who readily joins activity groups, participates in sports programs, and completes all the tasks required by his teacher, but never seems to be the one who stands out?
He is never the one who gets that extra nod of attention, or receives recognition or awards for being outstanding in whatever situation he is in.
You know he is bright, puts his best effort forward in everything he does and by all accounts does fine, but each time seems to be out shined by those few children that excel at everything they attempt.
Have you found yourself wondering why your child doesn’t seem to have that little extra edge that those that excel have that makes them just a bit more aggressive on the basketball court, or just a bit more “polished” when they give an oral presentation in class?
What do these children possess that your child doesn’t?
The answer is “self-esteem.”
So you say, “Okay, that’s easy…I just need to tell him more often how great I think he is and reassure him of how smart and talented I know he is!”
Raising your child’s self-esteem is not a simple, one answer fix.
Building healthy self-esteem is a process. It is a process that will grow and expand over time. You are right, however, in realizing that it is something that starts with you, his parent.
The process can begin at anytime in your child’s life. Of course, it is easier to start when they are very young, but building self-esteem can begin at any point in their lives.
Regardless of when it is started, the process is the same.
You, the parent, need to start by having an understanding of the principles of the law of attraction.
If you are not familiar with the law of attraction, there are shelves and shelves in every bookstore with numerous books and programs explaining the Universal law of attraction. I recommend choosing one that appeals to you.
Parenting using the law of attraction is based on the universal law that states what you think and believe you will create as your reality.
So, the first task at hand is to help your child understand this law and how it works.
The basic premise you need to convey is that everything begins as a thought. Your child needs to understand the importance of his thoughts.
Example: Negative thought: “I hope I can get the ball and make a basket at the game today.” Positive thought: “I am going to score five baskets today!”
This example demonstrates the difference between wanting to succeed and believing you will succeed.
The point is to encourage your child to think about himself and his capabilities in a positive way. This can not be done by simply sharing your opinion of how wonderful he is. He knows how much you love him! Unfortunately, in his eyes, the fact that you love him will lower the credibility of your words!
That is not to say you should ever stop praising and showering your child with encouragement.
Your child, however, needs more than the opinion of someone he knows loves him to gain the kind of confidence that will allow him to reach his full potential.
The second part of this process is designed to help your child understand that what happens in his life is within HIS power.
The law of attraction teaches us that we all have the power within us to control what thoughts we will accept and focus on and which ones we will reject. The thoughts we choose are the thoughts that will determine what IS.
Helping your child repeat this “positive mindset” exercise will help him develop the skill to think only positive thoughts and as he sees the positive results from these choices, he will know that he can accomplish whatever he wants to.
He will now have “confidence” in his abilities in whatever situation he faces.
The absolute beauty of the law of attraction is that it works all of the time for everyone. There are no conditions to be met for the principles to occur in your life.
Whether you believe it or accept it or even completely understand it, it IS working.
It will work against us by thinking negative thoughts and it will work for us by thinking positive thoughts.
Your role as the parent is to teach your child how to use his power to CHOOSE what his thoughts will be.
The only difference between your child and those that have that edge to succeed is not that they are brighter, smarter, or more talented… the difference is they BELIEVE they can do whatever they choose to do.
The difference is in their thoughts!
About the Author:
Denny Hagel is the co-author of The Law of Attraction: The Next Generation and co-owner of Innovative Parenting LLC, a company dedicated to teaching parents how to raise their children using the principles of the law of attraction. For more information and insights click on: