You Can be Great If You Really Want To

Anger strikes everyone at some time or another. How we respond to anger, however, can mean the difference between a healthy approach to problem solving and a violent, uncontrolled reaction that can hurt not only yourself, but those around you.

Definition of Anger

While anger as an emotion is difficult to describe, it does have a definition, provided by psychologists and therapists. From irritation to rage to intense, uncontrollable fury, anger runs through a gamut that can drive an individual forward to take constructive action or drive them to destroy.

On the physical level, anger brings about changes to body processes. Heartbeat speeds up and blood pressure rises as adrenaline surges through the system.

Part of the definition of anger is that it inflates the negative qualities of a person or situation you feel anger towards. Things seem worse than they are, triggering a fight or flight reaction. This exaggeration contributes to the instability of your mental state.

Anger can be a constructive force if handled properly. Anger about injustice leads many individuals to work to correct that injustice. But if mishandled, anger is just as likely to bring about the end of relationships, jobs, and even lives.

Controlling Anger

When anger becomes a destructive force, anger management techniques can help bank the fire and redirect the energy anger triggers. Anger management teaches how to recognize the signs of oncoming anger and redirect them, keeping them from leading to violence or regretful actions. Instead, the energy is focused on taking positive action to address what is causing the anger.

Sometimes this action involves breathing techniques to enable focus and control. Sometimes it involves learning to address another person to constructively express what causes your anger. Anger management does not invalidate anger or consider it inappropriate–it just helps prevent ensuing reactions from becoming out of control, which is inappropriate.

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Anger itself is not a problem – it is actually how well you manage it. Naturally, anger is a feeling of displeasure or animosity. Anger is an unpleasant emotion and naturally responded to perceive threats. In fact, the occurrence of anger will generate a problem only when you can not handle it in a proper and healthy way.

What is involved with anger?

There are some related components that build up your anxiety and tear down your emotion. So, starting with learning and understanding the particular factors that generate the anger are a good start for the successful anger management:

Emotion: This factor involves feelings such as sorrow, unhappiness, disappointment, dissatisfaction, frustration, etc. Thinking: The way you think can cause or worsen anger. It also can help you deal with it in a healthy way. An emotional response is to acknowledge that it is OK to be frustrated. Keep concerning on its solutions instead of focusing only on what is wrong with it. Body: Anger can result physical symptoms, such as muscle tension, increased heart rate and increased blood pressure.

In fact, emotional outburst and explosion can destroy the relationship between you and surrounded people such as family, friends, co-workers or even completed strangers. It is very important to learn and understand some anger management skills. Anger management techniques are a proven way to help you change the way you express your anger.

Technique #1 : Finding someone you trust

When you are in bad mood and started to be angry, do not shut the door and stay only with yourself. You need to be relaxed! Speak it out positively by consulting someone that you can feel free and trust to talk with. Sharing your worries with another person can slow down the worries and pull away all bad imagination in the proper perspective.

Technique #2 : Laughing at it

Having a good laughter is the best natural treatment method. Laughter can ease your burdens and draw you away from nonsense stories. Be in the company of amusing friends or spoil yourself with activities that can bring laughter into your life.

Technique #3 : Exercising

At anytime when you find out yourself is in the anxiety mode, distract it by getting some exercises. Physical activity can provide an outlet for your extreme and explosive emotions. Go out for a short walk or a soft run. Probably, swimming, lifting weights or shooting baskets can take you out from the emotional fluctuation as well.

Technique #4 : Muscle Relaxing

Muscle relaxation is one of the useful exercises for reducing anxiety. Start first relieving tension step with scalp, following with face, neck, shoulders, arms, chest, abdomen, legs, and feet. Then let’s relax all these muscle groups for a while. Following with the tensing phase, hold the tension for several seconds, then slowly release the tension. From this step, you can feel “draining” of the anxiety out of your body. Repeat all the steps from top to toe as many times as you want or do it anytime when you are in the anxiety mode.

Technique #5 : Proper Breathing

Understanding and learning relaxation skill can also assist you to manage your emotion when you nearly explode in anger. Practice deep-breathing exercises, create in your mind a relaxing scene, or repeat a calming word or phrase to yourself, such as “Take it easy.” Other efficient ways to deal with the anger is to listen to the music, write a story, paint a picture and do yoga.

Additionally, reading a book is one of the practical ways of treating the personal anxiety, because there are a number of helpful books regarding anger management. Some of them focus on particular situations, such as the management of anger in teens, in men or in couples. Many of them are workbooks with teaching methods on the exercises that improve your concrete Skills of Anger Management.

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Anger is an emotion that if left unmanaged or free to manifest itself in your life, will in one way or shorten your natural life.

Anger raises one blood pressure, causes endocrine hormones to flow freely through one’s system at time when they are unwanted, and changes our outlook in life to a straight negative.

Anger is the secret killer in our lives.

The Emotion of Anger

Anger is a dark cousin of the emotion fear, and is the most powerful emotion we posses, save that of love. Anger gives birth to the perception of hate, and feeds the emotion of revenge.

It changes someone’s state to that approaching the beast, and when left unbridled, poisons our thinking process.

Anger needs no explanation, as we all feel it daily. How we manage it however is the secret to not only removing its influence upon us, but perhaps opening doors to success that were previously closed.

Anger Management

As anger must compete with logic, and often given time logic will win the competition, the age old advice to count to 10 before reacting in anger has great merit.

While counting (called a cooling off period) logic and even love have a chance to manifest themselves before one’s conscious and even subconscious mind, and anger becomes diluted to the state where it can do little or no damage. This is the essence of anger management.

Along with time, anger is diluted almost to nothing, by simple breathing exercises.

See the exercise cited below, and after some moments of correct and profound breathing, our bodies and mind become filled with a sort of positive energy that dilutes anger to the point of disappearing.

However, if anger is allowed to mature, proliferate in our consciousness, hate soon appears, and our natural positive outlook and polite essence will become a dark and negative aspect in our existence.

Disease and error soon follow, and we become vulnerable to all negative influences. We do not manage, but become managed, by our anger and by those who know how to exploit angry people.

Breathe and Count

When very angry, for whatever reason, try to withdraw yourself from society for a few minutes, and go into private. When private (and this just may be in a bathroom or closet) try this breathing and counting exercise. It will take you a maximum of 5 minutes.

Start by deep breathing in a double inhalation and follow it by a double exhalation. Breathe in one short breath and follow it by a longer breath without exhalation. The sound would be huf, huuuuf.

Hold for a brief second and exhale also doubly as ho,hooooh. Do ten sets of these and then relax. Close your eyes and then breathe deeply so you follow the incoming air down into the lowest part of your lung.

Now imagine, while counting to 5, that air is golden white, like the sun, and it fills every cell in your body with light.

As you now deeply exhale (to the count of five) see the outgoing air black and smoking filled the emotions of anger and hate, and as they leave your body, they fly out to the universe to be recharged as positive energy and light.

After five minutes, rejoin society, and you will find your anger is gone , and logic has taken its place.

Instead of argument and exciting, you might discuss the matter calmly, and watch for a peaceful solution to appear. This is way of the ancients and has been passed down since time before time.

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