You Can be Great If You Really Want To

How to deal with an anger in the relationship with your ex spouse for a making up relationship?

 

 

 

 

Options to deal with anger:

- Write it out: Work through your anger by keeping a journal or
by writing letters BUT don’t mail them. It’s a way of putting down
what you think and feel and standing back and looking at what you
have written.

- Shout it out: Wind up the windows in your car or put your head
in a pillow, and scream. It helps to get rid of the negative energy in your body.

- Talk it out: Instead of directing your anger at your ex, talk to
a friend or seek help with a professional who specialises in anger
management.

Take responsibility for your part of the relationship break-up: It’s rare that only one partner is solely at fault. Recognising what makes you angry can help to find the triggers and old patterns so that you can take steps to stop repeating them. Think about the important issues: Talking about every little irritation provokes resentment: let go of the small stuff.

 

What to do about anger?

 

 

(1) Keep it in – or let it out?

Some experts say you should ‘express’  your anger rather than bottle it up. They point out that suppressing anger can lead to heart disease. Other experts say that expressing anger makes things worse because it exacerbates the difficult situation and can have unpleasant consequences for your relationships, your career, and even your personal freedom. The choice appears to be get it off your chest and you won’t get ill – but you may end up lonely or in prison. Or suppress your anger and you will be more popular – but you may get ill! Fortunately there is a third option – not to get angry in the first place.

 

 

(2) Dissolving anger

 

 

The best way of dealing with anger habit is to stop it occurring in the first place. Get to know which triggers that evoke your angry feelings and systematically defusing each of these. As you do this recognise how these triggers have controlled you, because they do – you encounter the trigger and off you go – on automatic pilot, out of control, ruled by your emotions. Start making an on-going list of all the triggers that spark you off. As you do these consider the cost of being in ‘their’ control? For example, your self esteem suffers – you afterwards feel bad with yourself because of how you’ve let yourself down and lost control. You feel bad about how others view you. Your family, partner, friends tend to treat you with caution, because they cannot relax in your company but have to remain on guard, waiting for the next explosion. Then there’s all the apologising and making up – ‘I’m sorry. I’ll never do or say that again, I promise!’ And no-one believes you. And there’s the cost to your peace of mind of endlessly going over events, re-running them and re-feeling the feelings over and over again! And each day watching for all the opportunities to feel annoyed.

 

 

(3) A trigger a week

 

Take a trigger each week and defuse that. Decide that from now on you want to be happy more of the time even if you have to let people ‘get away with things’. Write down the cost to your health, happiness, relationships, etc. of remaining a victim to this trigger. Just doing this won’t stop you becoming angry. You need to do a bit more. Immediately after becoming angry calm yourself with some breathing exercises and then have a rational chat with yourself – ‘OK, I did it again. I let myself down. I fell for it once again. But I’m learning to take things more easily because I know the cost of letting the triggers control me and I’ve had enough of being a victim to them!’ Developing your awareness in this way and on a regular basis will gradually defuse your tendency to fly off the handle. It will also defuse the tendency to justify your anger. In NLP we call these triggers anchors – check out the article on anchor-hunting too.

 

Indeed, life is short. Don’t let another day go by without taking a chance on happiness. You will never know until you try, so remember to make a move today. It can change or affect the rest of your life, therefore, at the very least, you can try to come out something for your ex love partner during your weekend plans. With a little practice, perseverance and patience, I believe that your relationship could be enhanced with the tips that I have shared earlier. If you have faced any problems with your loved ones, do not hesitate to visit this piece of article again.

 

 

I really have a strong belief that if you can understand what I have explained and applied what you have learnt from this piece of article, your problems can be eventually solved and your making up relationship can become more stable and stronger. I wish all the best for your making up relationship with your partner. Do always remember to spread word of mouth to your fellow friends for supporting the decision of having making up than breaking up.

 

 

 

How to get your girlfriend back?

 

Watch a video that shows you exactly what you must NEVER do, what you should do to get your ex back and why at http://www.squidoo.com/how_can_i_retrieve_my_ex_lover_back

 

 

You will also learn how to reverse the situation if you have already done those things that should NEVER be done.

 

 

 

Acne results in low self-esteem and demoralized living. In fact, the effect of ugly blotchy marks and oozing pimples is such that some people often feel dreaded to step out of their house.

Acne appears for the very first time during teens – one of the best times in life. During teens a person is at his best in every ways, except the appearance, which is so very important. Also this is the age when one is influenced by everything and everyone surrounding them. The thoughts, the opinions and everything else that ‘friends’ express is so very important then. You have also been through this I suppose as we all have.

Physical perfection has a great emphasis on our society. A slim body, a perfect skin and a glowing complexion are the 3 common agendas. This is always reflected in the way we treat ourselves, think about the person we are and the way we rate ourselves, even though subconsciously.

Developing acne at that stage in life can be a major setback for the confidence of a teen. It makes a person more preoccupied with the thoughts of acne, the shortcomings, the imperfections and the fact that he looks ugly with those blemishes. This builds up a feeling of shame, guilt and low self-esteem that compels the teen to withdraw himself from the world outside. He ends up hating to meet new friends and more so if the new entry is an opposite sex.

Acne is common in boys and girls alike. While some boys don’t really bother about it, girls simply cannot help but think about their acne all the time. In fact, some teens start behaving awkwardly, which makes their discomfort more evident in front of others. And, if by any chance any of the friends pass a remark, it would just act as fuel on fire.

Teens having acne have often shown certain characteristics of low self-esteem, such as:

Excessively concerned about their image

Withdrawing themselves from gatherings and parties

Blaming themselves for no reason at all

Mental and emotional confusion

Anxiety

Depression

Stress

Failing to take responsibilities

So, is there anything that can be done about the low self-esteem?

Well, yes! You just need to change the whole idea that you are looking ugly and you are a mismatch. That’s the first step. Acne is a skin problem that happens to most teens and to adults as well. So, what you need to do is seek some help from your friends and family.

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“Anxiety” can be expressed naturally by aggressive emotion which can has side effects to the lover’s relationship. Generally, when people are in the anxiety stage, they can lose control of themselves under the extremely emotional degree. As a result, the reaction from that certain stage of emotion can perform a perfect killer to harm your long love relationship.

In recent world that everybody has to be busy and stress with their feelings about the children, work, and money, most people tend to avoid themselves of no conversation about pregnancy, marriage and desire sex with their partners. However, physiologists found that couples can reduce their stress by sharing or talking each other about their tension feelings regarding their work, economic status, political issue and so on.

How anxiety destroys long love relationship?

Not all anxiety between lovers is instantly noticeable, even though it can still be destructive in the long term relationship. Passive aggression can become routine particularly when someone is always occupied with the no other way out feeling to let go of it.

No matter how hard you tried to nurture them or hide them under your burred loving life, the anxiety will never leave you until you can let it go positively and correctly. If you are in a relationship with someone who has a lot of anxiety, then you are driving yourself in a rocky road. It can quickly devastate the entire thing you beautifully build up together.

How to deal with it?

When you consider yourself is becoming angry, try this following tips:

Tip 1 :

Perform a master of your thoughts and disable it to control what you are obsessed with. Keep beating your thought and controlling that anxiety. Remember anxiety gains momentum when you are holding more and more negative attentions.

Tip 2 :

Practice self-control and manage over your feelings. Anxiety is like taking a ride on a rollercoaster. Once you start obsessing with negative thoughts and fears, they will generate themselves emotional tension and reaction.

Try distracting and diverting your thoughts by going out and talk to someone you trust and feel freely with at that moment. It is good for you to have someone to share your aggressive facts and problem.

Tip 3 :

Keep yourself and don’t allow yourself to have idle moments. Volunteer to clean up a whole house for a whole day. Probably, choose one of your favorite hobbies such as reading magazines, doing exercise, or meditation to shut down yourself from anxiety.

Tip 4 :

Take a look at a dog when it’s resting. Consider its body that is free of tension and switch off your brain by lying down and flying into the peaceful mode. Turn on some relaxation music to calm your anxiety. This perfectly helps to manage your body and mind recovered from everyday Stress and Anger.

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