You Can be Great If You Really Want To

Achievement of any goal or dream in life is the result of many contributing thoughts, attributes, and actions that cumulatively define the ‘law of success.’ Are any of these actions or attributes more important than the other? I don’t think so necessarily; however, without one essential attribute, perhaps none of the other actions would ever take place. This essential attribute is: self-esteem! To be successful in anything in life, you must first be willing to take risks. However, in order to take a risk, you absolutely must overcome the voices of fear and failure. Then, once this difficult (and on-going) task is accomplished, you must develop the ability to not worry about what other people think or say about you. If you can actually accomplish this, the inevitable result and reward is – a positive and healthy self-esteem. And it is our self-esteem, or belief and confidence in ourselves that is the catalyst that drives our actions.

Knowing this should logically explain the reason why certain people succeed; and likewise, why so many fail. Success is thus not solely determined by circumstances or situations, location or environment, genetics or skin color, age or ability, knowledge or money, or even who you know – success ultimately lies within the mind of each individual, and is determined by their belief, self-confidence, commitment, actions, and persistence in the goal or dream sought.

So – what are your dreams and goals in life? What is it that holds you back from accomplishing them? Could it actually be a lack of self-confidence in yourself, your abilities, and your potential? The solution obviously is developing increased self-esteem; however, doing this is simple in theory, yet extremely difficult in practicality. But thankfully, with consistent effort and discipline (and belief), it is absolutely possible. Let me suggest just 10 of the many ways we can increase our self-esteem so we can accomplish our goals and dreams in life:

1) Eradicate Limiting Beliefs: We each have limiting beliefs we must get rid of.  Never let yourself say ‘I can’t.’ Don’t think or say that things are impossible. You don’t need more time, money, or knowledge to accomplish your goals. You can become and achieve anything – it just starts in telling yourself that and believing it.

2) Forget What Others Say & Think: Develop the ability to not worry! Train yourself to not think of or care about what other people say or think about you.

3) Never Compare: You will never be perfect, and neither will anyone else. Be you, and be proud of that. The moment we stop worrying and comparing is the moment we start to realize our own potential.

4) Avoid Negative People: Just stay away from them, period!

5) Face Your Fears: Success will never be accomplished, dreams will never be realized, and self-esteem will never be obtained until you face your fears. That is not to suggest it will be easy or that you might fail, but until you face them, you’ll also never know if you could have possibly succeeded.

6) Failures Do Not Equate To YOU Being A Failure: If you fail, you have actually fallen forward because it is a necessary stepping stone to achieve success. Get up and learn from it. Your mistakes and failures never mean that you personally are a failure.

7) Fake It Till You Make It: If you currently have low self-esteem, just fake it till you make it. Easier said than done, right! But regardless, it is still true – you just have to do it.

8) Master Your Thoughts: Self-esteem is made evident in our emotions, verbal and non-verbal communications, and physical appearance. However, it is initiated in our own minds. Thus, the greatest secret of life is the ability to learn how to control our thoughts. We literally are the captains of our souls, the makers of our destiny, and the deciders of our attitude – self-esteem is thus a reflection of what goes on in our own minds.

9) Positive Self-Talk: The title of this principle should actually be: Positive self-talk, thoughts, and actions. Be positive in everything. Oh yes it is hard – but it is necessary. Think confidently, talk confidently, and act confidently. Look for and be positive in everything in life.

10) Repetition Brings Power: If you think that you will obtain self-esteem in a week after implementing these principles for a few days, you are sadly mistaken. Anything worthwhile in life takes consistent effort. Keep at it, and never quit. Persistence is a necessary element to be successful in anything.

Perhaps more important than any of the 10 principles just mentioned – develop the habit to lose yourself … often. Forget about yourself and think of others, serve others, help others, and give to others. The moment you can forget about yourself and help others is the moment your own self-image, confidence, and self-esteem will be heightened. And it is this self-esteem that is absolutely essential to initiate the ability to take risks, put forth action, and develop the character necessary to achieve success in anything.

Are you looking for an alternative method, instead of a prescription, for your stressed-out teenager, at home? If you have researched natural methods to lower the levels of anxiety, and stress – Yoga is probably a top consideration, by now.

Before you make any quick decisions, you should discuss your options with your primary care or family physician. If you do not like what you hear, you can always get a second or third opinion. Sometimes, a prescription is a solution, but prescriptions can have side effects, so you want to be aware of all of them.

You can research any prescribed drug by entering the name of the drug, in a search engine, on the Internet. You will find details, forums, or lists of common, and not so common, side effects. You can also check with Web MD.

This is not meant to scare you, but to help you make an informed decision. There are times, when the local pharmacist knows more about the side effects of a prescription than anyone. So, it is worth your while to discuss the subject with him or her.

Prescribed medicine may also be addictive. In order to lower stress levels, CNS (central nervous system) depressants can be prescribed to slow the brain functions down. Some of these are very addictive, so this may be a temporary solution. Yet, prescription medicines are also life savers. Due to the quick results, prescription medicine may be your first choice.

In comparison, Yoga has no such side effects, but the positive results may take weeks or months to see. Depending upon the situation, Yoga may be used as an adjunctive therapy at first. Later on, Yoga may become the primary therapy for stress management.

Yoga has many uses, but establishing family bonds is a valuable part of the practice. What should you do if the family ties between a parent and child were not so strong to start with? Sometimes, a parent and teen are complete strangers to each other.

For example: What if the family became separated, went through a divorce, if the children were brought up by a day care system, or if one of the parents was so career-oriented that family ties were not a priority? It is never too late to re-establish family ties, but there is much repair to be done.

Yoga, and other non-competitive activities, give both parties a chance for joint participation, without an adult being portrayed as the controlling parent or teacher. Activities, which are non-competitive, such as Yoga, give both parent and teen some “breathing room.”

One point for estranged parents to be aware of is – it takes time and a long-term commitment to develop strong family ties. Joint participation, in Yoga classes, gives time to repair the relationship. At the same time, Yogic philosophy guides teens to develop many good health practices.

In Hatha Yoga classes, careful alignment of the spine is emphasized, muscles are strengthened, the body becomes balanced, flexibility is enhanced, and a sound mind is developed.

The value of a healthy spine is overlooked, by those who are lucky enough to take it for granted, but it is a crucial nervous center. The spinal maintenance aspect is a valuable habit to learn at a young age. Yoga practice helps to create some space between the vertebrae, thus extending the life of our spine, and helping us to stay pain free in our later years.

With all the emphasis on good health, and developing awareness, teens that practice Yoga are less likely to be pressured into substance abuse or “following the leader.”

As teens approach adulthood, some of the best gifts parents can bestow on them, beside love, are: Establishing good health habits, the ability to see things as they are, and the ability to think for themselves. Yoga prepares teens for all of their challenges.

Copyright 2008 – Paul Jerard / Aura Publications

Know a job is really done by using completion criteria.

Define what successful completion of each task entails. Specify not only when the task is due, but also what standard must be met. You don’t want to tell someone who has worked really hard to complete a task that they misunderstood and you wanted a sledge hammer rather than an ordinary hammer.

The need to have due dates associated with tasks is well understood, but it’s still really hard to get a real commitment to a date. Meetings frequently end with a list of action items, each carefully associated with an owner, but with a mumble about setting due dates later. Given that most people who are assigned these tasks are extremely busy, and given human nature’s procrastinating tendencies, “later” is quite likely to become “never.” Be vigilant and persistent about setting due dates. Even if they’re tentative and you have to change them later, get something down as soon as the task is identified. Then follow up to make sure the task gets completed, rescheduled, reassigned or, if appropriate, dropped. The key is to drop tasks on purpose rather than let them slip away unnoticed until the next crisis.

Establishing an agreed-to due date is a good start, but it’s not sufficient. We need completion criteria that tells us when the task has been completed properly, i.e., what the quality requirement is. For example, suppose someone is assigned the task to design the reports you will use to track how effective your problem solution is. Is the task complete when the report designer says it is, or must the reports meet some other standard, such as answering a specific list of questions, enabling a decision to be made or being accepted by the project sponsor?

Using completion criteria can help avoid misunderstandings and delays.

Copyright 2008. Jeanne Sawyer. All Rights Reserved.