A 5 Step Anger Management Plan for Children

 

“Always forgive your enemies. Nothing annoys them so much.”
Oscar Wilde

Managing anger is the biggest emotional issue that most children face. Children who can learn to manage their anger have a head start on handling fears and other emotions.

Currently, our community is undecided about how to handle anger. In fact, anger is discouraged as we see no place for it in homes, schools or community. ‘Civilised people don’t get angry’ seems to be the accepted wisdom so we tend to encourage children to bottle up anger rather than let it out.

There are four ways anger is dealt with and only the fourth one in this list should be considered healthy. These are:

1. Muzzle it – Bury anger deep-down and it will go away is the attitude! This doesn’t work for many children as anger just simmers and doesn’t dissipate.

2. Muscle it – Some children lash out physically so that a friend, sibling or parent literally feels their anger.

3. Mouth it – Verbal abuse is usually hurtful and backfires on the angry person.

4. Manage it – Anger can be expressed in ways that are not hurtful to anyone including themselves.

The following five steps can form the basis of an anger management program for children and teenagers:

1. Recognise it: The first step is to help children recognise when they get angry. What are the physical signs? What are they thinking? We are all different but tension, heavy breathing and clenched teeth are common reactions.

2. Name it: Develop a vocabulary with your child around anger. “Mad as a snake”, “about to lose it”, “short fuse” are some possibilities. Children can probably generate more! Giving the emotion a name is the first step to recognising anger.

3. Choose it: Help children recognise that they have a choice to stay in control or lose control when they get angry.

4. Say it: Encouraging children to express how they feel verbally is healthy. Yelling at someone when they are angry is not. The use of I statements is one way of letting others know how they feel. ‘I feel really mad when you say nasty things to me. I feel like …’ is one way of being heard and letting the anger out.

5. Let it(out): Help children find a legitimate physical outlet for their anger. They may go for a run, belt a pillow or play a physical game to let their frustration out. They may even pour their anger into a letter, some work or a productive activity.

The maxim for managing anger in healthy ways should be: “There is nothing so bad that we can’t talk about it. However there are behaviours that we don’t engage in when we are angry.”

Michael Grose is Australia’s NO. 1 parenting expert. He is the director of www.parentingideas.com.au, the author of seven books for parents and a popular presenter who speaks to audiences in Australia, Singapore and the USA. Get your FREE Chores and Responsibilities for Kids Guide when you visit http://www.parentingideas.com.au


Get a hold of Michael’s sensational new book Why First Borns Rule the World and Last Borns Want to Change It at www.michaelgrose.com. You’ll be astounded when you learn about your birth order personality and how the postion in your familoy impacts on your life!


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Long term goal setting is very important; however it should be in conjunction with your short term goals. Long term goals are very essential whether in an organization or on one’s personal life because it provides direction, but if that’s all you have, it is very easy to become discouraged or frustrated.

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Identifying your goals for the long term as well as the short term may be a little bit hard to balance. Learning how to set goals in a way that your goals themselves actually help you achieve them will bring about great results.

On the other hand, if you only have short term goals and no long term goals, then the result is that you won’t have a distinct focus for the future. Achieving short term goals is great and gives you a sense of accomplishment, but do you know the reason why are you achieving them? Without the long term goal, all you will have is a number of achieved goals that would not mean much in the long run.

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Taking on the “battle” of Strategic Marketing: 6 Steps to Developing a Strategic Marketing Plan That Works!


Taking on the “Battle” of Strategic Marketing: 6 Steps to developing a Strategic Marketing Plan that works!

Marla Cooper is a Senior Associate and Strategic Marketing professional at Bloom Consulting, Inc., specialists in nonprofit fundraising, strategic planning, marketing and leadership development.

Why is it that I’m often met with those glazed stares when I’m brought in as a Strategic Marketing Consultant and I ask to see an organization’s “Communications Plan”. This should be as basic to any organization as an Operating Budget and yet it seldom exists as a comprehensive, integrated and well thought out document. Why is this so often neglected by organizations when it is clearly so key to success in today’s competitive and dynamic marketplace? Possibly because there are many misconceptions about what a Strategic Marketing Plan is and what is should do.

Before exploring the steps to developing a Strategic Marketing Plan, let’s first determine exactly what it means. The term “strategy” is rooted in military tradition. According to Webster’s Dictionary, a “strategy” is defined as “the science and art of military command exercised to meet the enemy in combat under advantageous conditions”. The Random House Dictionary of the English Language defines the same term as “the science or art of combining and employing the means of war in planning and directing large military movements and operations.” “Marketing” is then defined by Webster’s as “the act of selling or purchasing in a market”, while Random House explains marketing as “the act of buying or selling in a market.”

Therefore, if you combine both of these terms to explain “Strategic Marketing” you arrive at “waging war to sell in the market”. It’s no wonder we have come to describe our marketing activities as “Campaigns” and engage in “Guerilla Marketing”!

I like to take a more peaceful approach to Strategic Marketing which can be viewed more as the art of influencing people. In the world of Non-Profit Organizations, this “influence” takes the form of convincing potential donors and members to identify with your organization enough and align themselves with your mission to the extent that they will “buy in” by giving money and/or paying for membership. If you are thinking, “we have a marketing program that does this”, I would encourage you to ask these questions:

1. Is your organization currently raising the funds it needs?

2. If no, are those you solicit capable to providing these funds?

3. If yes, why isn’t your organization reaching its goals?

The answers to these questions can be twofold. If your organization is aware of what potential donors and/or members want but you’re not able to currently offer it, your organization must enhance your offerings to address this need.

If your organization isn’t quite sure what potential donors and/or members want, or you’re just not sure why your message isn’t compelling enough to get results, the solution is to know your audience better.

To both of these points, a Strategic Marketing Study and Plan is the way to address the situation. It may seem ominous if you’re not a Marketing Professional, but by following a series of disciplined of steps, your organization can develop a Strategic Marketing Road Map that can get you where you need to go.

Step #1: Form a Marketing Committee

Your organization most likely has some type of marketing or communications committee. Keep this committee small since the work and direction generated by this group needs to be clear, concise and on target. Marketing by consensus, while necessary at times, can provide for weak and confusing messages in your advertising and marketing activities that speak to internal perceptions instead of real needs in the marketplace.

Step #2: Set the Goals of your Committee

Keep this to a short list with a timeline to expand your goals based on how the marketing is going. Taking on too much at once can derail the entire process. A singular focus and mission to start with can give your committee cohesiveness and some early successes that will provide the momentum to go forward.

Step #3: Do your research

The committee may think they know what current and potential donors and/or members feel about your organization and what motivates them. However, organization boards and leadership can become very insular without even realizing it. It is of the utmost importance to stay current and aware of what those less involved and connected to your organization perceive about your organization and what they value about their mission. The only true way to know this is to ask. This doesn’t need to be a long and involved or expensive process. It can be as simple as 5 committee members contacting 5 to 10 individuals each and asking a series of well thought out questions. It is important that those interviewed represent a cross section of all those that will be targeted by any marketing efforts. This step is very important since all that follows will be based on what is learned during this process. Take it seriously.

In addition, with the internet we have access to an abundance of good information and research done by others. Committee members need to take on the responsibility of researching information and data available regarding your competitors, your market, your industry, your target audience and current trends. Much can be learned from simply borrowing from others who have often spent a great deal of time and money to learn just want you want to know. Become adept at on-line research and you’ll be surprised at what’s out there if you just look!

Step #4: Establish your Mission and Vision

If your organization has a Mission and Vision Statement it needs to be carefully reevaluated based on your learning from the research. If your organization does not currently have an approved Mission or Vision Statement go no further until this step is completed. Everything that your organization does or is should be reflected in these statements. It should guide every activity and every communication and be used in evaluating both professional staff and volunteers be they board members or not.

A Vision Statement inspires by articulating the future of an organization. A Mission Statement controls and clarifies what an organization does right now. It’s important that neither of these be an “Alphabet Soup” of all the elements that all the key players think are important for an organization to be. It needs to be practical and reflect reality. Clear and concise Mission and Vision Statements should contain at most 3 to 5 elements that live within the organization and be the standard by which all initiatives and standards are evaluated. If it is too broad it will be meaningless and if it is too narrow it will not inspire.

Step #5: Develop your Strategic Marketing Plan

Based on the above steps, your committee should now have a clear understanding and direction and can develop a Strategic Marketing Plan that details the following:

Ø Who is your target audience: what population or individuals provide the best chance for your organization to reach its goals?

Ø What is your message: based on your Mission/Vision statement what do you want to communicate the target audience? What is it about you that is unique and compelling and allows you to deliver on your mission?

Ø How to communicate your message: based on your target audience what is the best way to reach them?

Step #6: Execute your Strategic Marketing Plan

Here are some helpful hints that will enhance your Marketing Plan and ensure it has the best chance of succeeding.

Ø Give specific responsibilities to committee members, staff and volunteers for specific elements of the Plan. Create ownership of the Plan among individuals so it’s not the “Committee’s Plan” but individuals have a stake in it as well.

Ø Track your results. Every marketing or programming initiative or effort undertaken as a result of this plan should be tracked to know what is working and what is not.

Ø Make sure your organization can deliver on your message. If you are highlighting new programs or features of your organization in your marketing, be absolutely certain all aspects are ready and available before going with the communications. Remember, you never get a second chance to make a first impression! If someone is attracted to your organization because of something they saw or read and come to find out it’s not as they thought, you’ve lost a donor or member and will have an exceedingly difficult time getting them to reconsider.

Ø Build on your strengths and minimize your weaknesses. Make sure all marketing activities highlight what your organization does best and excels at.

Be bold and provide leadership. In almost all cases, some form of marketing is better than none. Get your organization out there and make sure it has the exposure it needs. In closing, I’ll pay homage to the military origins of my profession as a Strategic Marketing Professional by urging you to “Get out there and market them before they market you!”

Contact Marla Cooper, Bloom Consulting, Inc. (610) 348-4035 or marlacooper@bloomconsultinginc.com

Having risen through the ranks in the for-profit, corporate world for nearly 20 years, Marla has honed her skills as a marketing professional in a competitive, dynamic and demanding environment. While working at top advertising agencies early in her career, she learned to use communications to sell ideas, services and products of all kinds. With a mid-career move to the “client side,” Marla developed an expertise in conducting and interpreting market research and trends to build awareness, impact perceptions and create demand. At Bloom Consulting, she puts her experience to work for nonprofit clients, developing marketing and communications strategies that produce immediate and quantifiable results.

Enhancing Self Esteem – The Booster Plan!

As the experts say, self-esteem is a way in which the person perceives himself. The ones who strongly believe in their capabilities are often successful in all aspects of their lives and those who do not often experience several difficulties through their life.

Any individual on this earth is not born with self-esteem. The child’s parents & guardians bring up the child in a way that they have self esteem & believe in their self. Yet if they fail, the child psychologists can help you sort the matter.

You must have a pre-defined lesson plan in order to building self-esteem in a person. It takes a very scientific and time consuming approach in working out this plan for any individual. Though even the doctors do not say that this method is just perfect but for those who need help, it is no less than a true boon.

For this one must undergo a specified test. This test as designed by the learned psychologists has some segmentation. For each question, the patient or the individual must respond in the prescribed way. These ways are – ranking from highest to the lowest, selecting one answer from the given four choices, and filling the blanks and / or completing the given sentences.

The varied categories of the test as used by the psychologists in order to develop the lesson plan are as follows:

1. Procrastination

There are various types of people based on their different working habits. The go-getters always complete their work in time and there are ones who initiate the job but are not able to finish it. For the second category the doctors are able to device way & means through this test in order to boost their interest & enthusiasm for the work, s that they may be able to complete their tasks in time always.

2. What If

This caters to those who are afraid to take risks in their life. They keep thinking ‘what if’ and then go with the crowd, irrespective of the other aspects of the decision. They often fail to initiate any task and if they do, they follow it up with a fear of failure. The doctors through this test device the tricks to inject that confidence & self deciding power in the person to take risks and navigate the new routes in life.

3. Everyone makes mistakes.

There are people ho get stuck to their failures so much that their past does not allow anything positive to happen in their present & the future. They keep regretting their faults or the circumstances and make no efforts to move ahead. The psychologists are there to define ways & means to enable such individuals to just let go and get ready for the challenges of the life ahead.

4. Generalizing

At times people have this habit of generalizing certain facts or certain characteristics about a person. This is happens most oft with the trauma patients. The specialists can make the lesson plan in order to exorcise that ghost & help them forget the past.

5. Anger

Though a natural emotion, it can be very dangerous if it happens in excess. Often we find people looking for the anger management classes. The psychologists in the tests the factors that make a person angry, and work towards the required changes in their lesson plan.

6. Extroverts & Introverts

People have different nature and different patterns of behavior. Some are so extrovert that they have innumerable friends and others have so les friends that they start feeling lonely. The psychologists help you have long lasting relationships with all friends & family and with people of both same and the opposite sex.

7. Contentment in Life

The last segment of the test deals with questions that land up to the conclusion that if the person is happy with everything that life has offered to him / her or not. There are people who are quite contended and have no big aspirations, so they are very happy with their lives. Those who feel bitter as they have a lot aspirations unmet and many disliked circumstances in their lives, for them the specialists device the lesson plan to help them point out the positive & happy aspects around them.

It is not necessary that everybody scores well as they might gain success in one segment and fail in the other. Remember, improvement is always possible in the individual and that is also a must for their growth. And that is the ultimate target of these tests and finally the lesson plan!

Abhishek is a Self-Development expert and he has got some great Self-Esteem Boosting Secrets up his sleeves! Download his FREE 52 Pages Ebook, “How To Boost Your Self-esteem” from his website http://www.Positive-You.com/668/index.htm . Only limited Free Copies available.