Tag Archives: Selfesteem

Boosting Your Child’s Self-Esteem

One of the most important aspects of personal growth is developing a healthy self-concept. What we think of ourselves, and the way we decide how to value ourselves, makes more difference than almost any other factor in determining what we do with our lives. Parents have the awe- some responsibility and privilege of guiding their children to develop a healthy sense of self. Following are some guidelines to help in that task.

PRAISE

Everybody needs praise, but not all praise is equal. To be effective, praise must be genuine: “I like the way you are remembering your assignments,” rather than, “Wow! You’re so smart you’ll soon leave all the other kids behind.”

The most effective praise may be directed toward the child’s weakest areas: “I know it’s hard for you to keep your room clean, so I’m really proud of the job you’ve done this week.” By letting her know you notice her e orts in these tough areas, you bolster her con?dence.

CRITICISM

Help your child develop the “emotional shrug” to handle criticism.  Learning to distinguish between justifed and unjusti?ed criticism is a big ?rst step. Then the child can learn to respond to justi?ed criticism by agreeing and thanking the person. He can also learn to respond politely to unjusti?ed criticism and let it “roll off his shoulders.”

TEASING AND INSULTS

These are really the same as unjusti?ed criticism, and the “emotional shrug” is appropriate. Empathize with your child and help her learn to respond kindly and with pride to such behavior.

REJECTION

It’s tough to be overlooked for an honor, not invited to a party, cut from the team, or turned down for a date. Through patience and empathy help your child to affirm his worth despite disappointments. Teach him to work on being his best self, developing positive relationships, and emphasizing his strengths.

Help your child understand that she will not be the best in everything, and some people will not like her, but that she is a good person and is important to you and to God.

APPEARANCE

Encourage your child to learn to like his appearance even if he isn’t a “hunk” or she isn’t “Miss America.” Teach good grooming and help him learn how far a smile can go toward making a person attractive. If she really is overweight or underweight help her to work toward healthy eating and activities to normalize the weight, but don’t push.

MISTAKES

No one can be perfect, so help your child learn how to handle mistakes and failures. Tell him about your own failures and how you got past them.

Teach your child to set reasonable goals and work toward achieving them, but not to be dismayed when she comes up a bit short. Show her Tong Bi Quan-Mandarin-a martial art that mimics the actions of the long arms of an ape. that giving your best e ort is more important than succeeding.

SPIRITUAL RESOURCES FOR SELF-ESTEEM

Your child is a person of worth be- cause God created him as a person of worth–and that’s true of you, too.

Sometimes we teach children, “God loves you when you are kind . . . or do your homework well . . . or mind your parents” . . . or whatever else we want them to do.

We should be teaching them, “God loves you!” Period, exclamation mark, and de?nitely no question mark!

The very best source of a healthy self-esteem, for your child, and for you, is knowing you are accepted and loved by God. Then, on the basis of his acceptance and love, you can accept yourself and free yourself to be all you can be.

Melvin Grant is a contributing writer for Martial Arts Monthly magazine.

http://www.learnmartialartsonline.com
http://www.martialartsteachers.com

Confidence Building Activities: 3 Easy Ways To Build Confidence And Self-Esteem

It’s natural for us to be overcome by shyness or insecurity every once in a while. But if you’re the kind of person who’s terrified of everything, then you need some help. In this article, you’ll learn about a few confidence building activities that are guaranteed to improve your way of life.

Why do you have to suffer through extreme shyness when you know you can do something about it? These confidence building activities, while not the “end all, be all,” can help you get past your wallflower syndrome and help you get your life back.

Confidence-Building Activity # 1: Start a Journal.

Coming to terms with your insecurities will greatly help you boost your confidence. Sometimes, all that holds us back is fear. When we allow fear of embarrassment or fear of what may come stand in our way, we will not be able to function well at all.

However, when we confront our fear – even explore it – through writing, it becomes easier to handle. Writing about little triumphs will also have a significant impact on your ego.

Confidence-Building Activity # 2: Fix the Physical.

Nothing encourages confidence more than a makeover. Most of us have trouble with activities to gain self-esteem because we don’t even like how we look like. Our self image is poor and basically self-destructive.

While a make-over won’t make you a showman overnight, it can give you the boost of confidence you need to take the first step. The physical is but one aspect of the process of course. There are a lot more self-esteem activities out there that really sink their teeth into the problem.

Confidence-Building Activity # 3: No Harm Trying.

If you want to build your confidence, you can try out different contests and join different organizations that appeal to you. Taking baby steps is completely normal.

For example, if you’ve always wanted to be a newscaster, why don’t you start practicing in front of the mirror? You have to be able to watch your own reflection first before you try news casting in front of a million home viewers.

From solo performances, you can try speaking up more during a community forum or gathering.  These small gigs will help you grow your confidence, as well as improve your craft. By the time you have the opportunity to audition to become a real newscaster, you’ll be thoroughly prepared.

Everyone needs a shot of confidence. Whenever you feel your own dwindling in stock, look back at these confidence building activities and practice them.

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Self-Esteem And Economy

Let\’s take a look at how to build your self-esteem during hard times.There is a financial crisis all over the world as you know it. People are loosing their jobs, can not afford to pay their mortgages or credit cards and having difficulties to make a living. Everybody is having hard times.

Now, having a new car or moving into your dream home is not an option. Flying to the Caribbean or soaking on the sun in Hawaii is very unlikely to happen.

Nobody really knows where the economy is going or how our future will look like.There was the G20 Summit couple moths ago in Brazil, where 20 of the world\’s largest economies gathered to come up with the solution to solve the world financial crisis. So, what is the solution? They do not really know.The world\’s best financial experts don\’t know how to fix this.

But, there is an advantage of situations like this even if it\’s very difficult to acknowledge that.

People are more focused on REAL VALUES. People pay more attention to families, friends and loved ones. They spend more time taking care of each other than ever before. Their focus is on helping others who are in need.

People are trying to be happy with whatever they have. And, that is very important.
When you can not afford to dine-out you will start cooking to save money.You start cooking your daughter\’s favorite dish and you will see her smile after dinner, because that is what she was missing. Quality time with the family. Embrace that feeling and enjoy it.

Your focus has changed direction. You have more time to spend with yourself, your family and friends. Most of us having the same difficulties and that feeling can ease up the tension, knowing that you are not alone.

I can not emphasize enough the importance of the real values. You, your family and your friends.

Whatever happens in your life is not as important as your approach toward that particular event. You make the decision to feel good, energized and awesome or dwell on your misery and don\’t do a thing to live a happier and more prosperous life you all deserve. Focus on the real values and build your self-esteem.

So, WHAT TO DO NOW?

1. Make a list of things you have always liked to do. Make a list of things your children and spouse always liked to do and do it together.

2. Take long walks alone or with your loved ones. It doesn\’t cost you anything, but it\’s an interesting self-discovery and a wonderful way to explore others. During the walk ask questions. Try to figure out the other person\’s interests, hobbies and their inner values. Do these hobbies together if you can.

3. Reach out to others with kind words and a positive approach toward life.

4. Play board games with others.

5. Call a friend randomly and ask her or him about their hobbies.

6. Go out, watch the sunset and make a wish. Do that with your spouse or your children.

7.  Spend more time with people under age 6 and over age 70. It\’s truly an amazing experience. The honesty, playfulness and creativity of young children will touch your heart. I can guarantee that. The eternal wisdom of the elderly will take you different places. You start wondering: \” We all knew how to enjoy life when we were young. We have found that feeling again after we retired. So, why don\’t we just do the same thing in between?\”

8. Learn something new. Read a book or listen to music. There is so much you can do.

These are just very few examples of what you can do to have some fun during even these difficult times. People are always more important than any assets you own. Own the feeling of being happy, positive and you will become the richest person on this planet with your most valuable \”assets\” inside.

Zoltan Roth is a native Hungarian teacher who resides in the United States. His passion is to help people around the globe to discover their enormous mental potential to create a happy, peaceful life we all deserve. For more information please visit his website at www.selfesteem2go.com

Boost Your Self-Esteem with Affirmations

Low self esteem is usually a result of self-depreciation: the negative messages you constantly feed yourself, over and over again.These messages may have originated from your parents, your siblings, school-yard bullies, or even your ex-partners. But no matter where they came from, it’s your own dear sweet head replaying these negative messages, the negative thoughts, over and over and over again.

By repeating these negative messages time and time again, they are absorbed by the subconscious. So, it makes sense that feeding your mind more positive messages can make a powerful difference!

Remember, first and foremost, YOU and ONLY you decide what thoughts to dwell on. Sure, thoughts come and go. And yes, they do go too. Just have a “back door” open, thank them for visiting, and see them on their merry way out again.

What stops most people is the uncertainty of what to say, and how to word affirmations for optimal effectiveness.  Below you’ll find some simple tips to help you write effective affirmations for improving your self-esteem.

1)    Present tense.  First, it’s helpful to word affirmations in present tense, not future.  You wouldn’t want to say, “I will learn to love myself” because that makes it sound like you’ll get around to it “someday.”  Instead you could say, “I choose to love myself.”  The wording of that affirmation does two things:  it empowers you with the addition of the words “choose to,” and it puts the timeframe in the present moment.

2)    Believable.  At the same time, your affirmations should be believable to you.  If you tried to say, “I am a wonderful person with a lot to offer the world,” you may not really believe that, so your subconscious mind might reject it.  Instead, try to focus on a process rather than an end result in your affirmations.  Say something like, “I am embrace my uniqueness and share it confidently with others.”

3)    Use the right tone.  When you recite affirmations, you can do so aloud (preferred) or just mentally (only if you must), but you should focus heavily on the TONE you use.  Rather than saying the words without emotion like you were reading a newspaper – really inject an element of love and tenderness into them.  Your subconscious mind picks up on the emotional aspect of what you’re saying more than the actual words.  Imagine the difference between saying the words, “I really love myself” with a tone of love and compassion, or sarcasm.  Which do you think would have a greater impact on your subconscious mind?

4)   Ownership. Make sure the affirmation is about YOU. You canNOT make an affirmation that involves another person’s initiative. As much as I’d love to, the affirmation “My daughter will clean her room every day before she goes to bed at night” will FAIL, because it is NOT in my control.

5)    Repetition.  Once you’ve got some affirmations formed to work on your self-esteem, try saying them several times a day.  Remember, your subconscious mind is constantly playing back old, negative messages – so you want to counteract those as much as possible.  Keep reciting your more positive thoughts on a regular basis – especially when you become aware that you’re thinking negatively about yourself.

6)    Give it time. Finally, remember that it will take time to change those old, negative messages in your mind to something more positive.  It may take a few weeks or even months before you’ll notice an obvious difference in how you feel, and you may be tempted to think it isn’t working.  Keep with it, and you will begin to see a difference eventually!  Most likely it will be a gradual change.  Little by little you’ll start feeling more positive, and notice that you’re feeling a bit happier and lighter.  That’s your signal that it’s working!

To your ultimate success my friend!

Britt Santowski, author of chickrag, the blog for women entrepreneurs, and founder of I’m Allowed.com, the Can-Do entrepreneur’s resource.

Britt Santowski, author of http://www.chickrag.com, the blog for women entrepreneurs, and founder of http://www.imallowed.com, the Can-Do entrepreneur’s resource.

How To Raise Self-esteem In 7 Quick Steps

The first thing that you should do is to take a quick step back and appraise your life. For too long you have been looking from the inside out of your life, and you may not be able to spot the mistakes that you have been making, so you need to get yourself out of this perspective and look at the big picture. When you are able to look at the blueprint of your life, then you will be able to see what areas you need to strategise.

Next, you need to breathe deep and find a space where you can meditate and relax. A clear and focused mind is one of the most important things you need to have to be able to regain your confidence and self esteem. When your mind is cluttered with negative thoughts or of work (they are one and the same sometimes), then you are not able to concentrate on the act itself.

You now need to strategise. What is it you want to do. Set down clear objectives of what you want to achieve in regards to your own personal development and set out from there. It can be anything from just gaining a little confidence, too being able to talk to the girl you always liked or to even excel at presentations at work. The thing about this is that when one thing happens, it will spill over to the rest of your life.

Make a list of the things that are uniquely you – the positives and the negatives and with this list, you can now find out what is so bad about you and what your natural gifts are. This way you know what to concentrate on and what areas in your life need improvement. When making this list, always recruit the help of your peers and the people that are around you a lot, and by doing so, your list will more accurately reflect the good and bad about you.

Another thing you need to understand is the need to celebrate you achievements as much as you can, and this is the method of channelling as much positive energy as you can to yourself. Whenever you reach a milestone, have a small celebration and involve as many people as you can. This way, the positive energy counter will build up in your favour.

Also, make a list of these achievements, and this will be called your feel good list. Look at it anytime you need to so that you will feel good about yourself, especially during the times of duress in your life. This list can mean the difference between slipping back into areas of low self esteem and the road to a more confident and convincing you.

Last but not least, you need to track your ‘emotional progress’ – to say the least. Knowing whether or not you are improving will help you to re assess the methods that you are using as well as allow you to understand the seriousness of the problem. If conventional methods like these do not work, then a psychologist could be of help to you.

Click Here to grab your FREE “Unleashing Your Inner Confidence In 5 Easy Steps” Report. Achieve success in life with these proven and tested techniques to allow yourself to be more confident in anything you do.

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