You Can be Great If You Really Want To

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Low self-esteem occurs when we have a poor self-image of ourselves.  We look at ourselves in the mirror and have nothing positive to say.  This is a vicious cycle because what feeds your low self-esteem is the negative things you say to yourself, and the lower your self-esteem goes, the more negative things you will have to say about yourself.

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5 sure signs you have low self-esteem are

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1)      You think negative things about yourself often and think more about the things you can’t do and wish you could do than the talents and skills you already have. If you can’t say one positive thing about yourself then it is a sure sign.

2)      You’re in denial.  No matter how many times someone may compliment you, you always think he or she are lying or just plain delusional.

3)      You stop taking care of yourself.  You see no reason to dress nicely and have given up on trying to look attractive.

4)      You get very upset if you make a mistake or look foolish in front of other people.

5)      You always try to predict things that will happen but will often do this in a negative manner.  You believe nothing good can happen to you.  All you get or in some cases, deserve are bad things.

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If this sounds like you, then its important to understand that there is something driving you to have low self-esteem such as a family member, co-worker, peer or your partner constantly putting you down and making you feel like less of a person or maybe you are stuck at a job that is below your potential.   It is up to you to investigate your life and pinpoint where it stems from.

It is also important to understand that low self-esteem can lead to depression, obesity, alcohol abuse, drug abuse, eating disorders and more if not changed for the better.

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Anger is a regular emotion but needs to be addressed right to be displayed positively for a healthy lifestyle. Some common scenes we can conjure of extreme anger include couples fighting, abusive parents that beat children or teens being intolerant and insolent with figures of authority, though even children are affected by intense feelings of anger – even very small ones!

Anger in very young children is difficult to pinpoint as it needs careful observationto identify this problem; very small children cannot express their feelings and their getting upset is taken as a temper-tantrum when it may well be a case of not being able to verbalize their emotions. A little kid in a mall demanding something may throw a tantrum and it can upsetting for parents and the kid both to witness such a situation, but dismissing this kind of behavior – as is often done – is not the solution to deal with it. Being a child is not an excuse for bad behavior and even angry children must be taught about negative, undesirable behavior.

A child’s upbringing must include guidance, tolerance and patient discipline towards desirable behavior through stressing on a value system and appreciating and acknowledging desirable behavior; since children learn from a young age what is good and bad, they must also be directed in the path they should follow to become healthy teens and adults, including controlling their temper.

Anger management programs are specially designed to find out the root cause of a particular child’s anger-issue as each one is different and thus treatment must be individual too; this makes it imperative for the program to be based on a specific area for one child and another for the second and so on, using multiple methods for testing the problem nagging the person. Some kids resort to an angry outburst, others take a silent or uncommunicative approach and still others don’t give a clue to their inner feelings; in all cases, time is of importance in understanding, identifying and solving the search for reasonable reactions to anger-issues.

Involve young kids in anger management awareness by giving them activity sheets with coloring pages, quizzes, puzzles and situations that require ideal behavior answers if the children put themselves in certain situations described or depicted there. They are aimed at being a play-way method to effectively teach anger management to children by giving them something enjoyable to do that holds their attention long enough to deal with the problem in a subtle way and teach them better values, such as sharing, using toys in turn and being polite even when disagreeing with someone.

Games and worksheets designed around potentially tense situations for children are thus, both ways to teach them about anger management even without kids realizing their problem is being assessed and addressed.

For older children who are willing to verbalize their feelings, it is a good idea to take them for counselling on this issue and build trust and comfort levels to bring their inner-most feelings in the open to find the best way to cope with situations and people that make them angry besides teaching them about ways to deal effectively, positively with anger. They can be asked to write down or draw the angry situation or reaction to bring out the pain, frustration and embarassment of an angry situation and telling them asking for help is not a bad thing, is just the way to go about making anger management techniques successful for both younger and older kids.