You Can be Great If You Really Want To

These ‘Brain Beating Confidence and Self Esteem Tips’ set out to help you discover how your internal self programming works and what affects it. This then allows you to set the program so that whatever it is you want to achieve becomes more of a probability and less of a dream. Every action starts with a thought. Let’s see what you are thinking.

Tip One : Record your thoughts (No – not ALL of them)

First, acknowledge that there is a little voice inside your head that controls everything that you say or do and therefore everything that you achieve. It’s this little voice we need to control. Before we start to make changes let’s listen to what it’s saying first, then we’ll know what we need to change, if anything.

Listening to what your inner voice is telling you is a lot easier said than done. You’ll find that as soon as you concentrate on what instructions are coming to you, the dialogue will straight away change to whatever you want to hear. It’s O.K. I’m on the right path you then think.

Maybe. Maybe not.

Try this exercise and see if it your results change.
You will need a pen, a notebook and a timer. You will need to do this exercise many times and compare the results over a period of time so use a notebook dedicated solely for this exercise. Most of us now have a mobile phone. You could use the countdown timer in that, or a kitchen timer, or even an alarm clock.

Set the time to go off in at least half an hour from now. An hour or more would be better. Far enough into the future so that you have forgotten about it by the time it goes off. As soon as it goes off try to write down exactly what you were thinking about as it erupted. This may take some practice as the alarm may startle you and ruin your thoughts. Vibration alarms on phones are best to prevent this happening.

What this does is to enable you to record what you were thinking without you concentrating on a definite idea you thought you should be thinking about. Try doing this exercise only two or three times a day.  Vary the times of day so that you will be doing different activities. Over a period of a week or so you will get a reasonable idea of what you are regularly thinking about.

Now, here’s the key, are your thoughts mostly positive or negative? Are they about what you are doing, what you were doing or what you’d like to do? Most crucially, are they in line for you to achieve what you want to achieve in life?

For the record, when my alarm went off I often used to be thinking about what I was reading or doing at the present time. Unfortunately, as soon as the alarm went off I immediately started thinking about what I SHOULD be doing. This means I was often NOT doing what I needed to do to follow my dream. Do your results show you are following your dream?

Later in this Brain Beating Tips series I’ll tell you what causes your thoughts and what you can do to change. Meanwhile, have you looked at how you can start to make changes in yourself?

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Welcome to my article which I am sure will help improve the quality of your life. There are times in life when you probably wished you had a bit more confidence. Maybe you have goals you want to achieve, to have that job or ask that person out. Confidence affects the quality of your life and if you learn how to get better confidence and self esteem then the sky’s the limit for you! You can virtually make your dreams come true if you have the confidence to do it. I have some useful tips that I live by!

Beliefs- these tell you what is and what is not possible. If you believe that having a successful career means not having a family life then maybe you can have both. You need to question certain principles and beliefs. I am not taking about religion here. I am talking about general beliefs held in society. Have you ever heard someone say ‘you’re too old or too young to do something’? Is that really true. Of course not. Change your beliefs and you change what you believe is possible. So start believing today that your goals are within reach. Other people believe that having money is bad. Is that really true? If you currently believe that having a lot of money is bad yet you want to have a highly profitable business there is a contradiction. Change beliefs to suit your goals.

Positive perspective- Is your glass half empty or half full. Have you ever met someone who maybe has suffered a tragedy and you wonder ‘why are they so happy.’ Well its quite simply because they choose to be happy, they have decided to focus on the positive things in life and believe me there are many great things in this life.

You are in control- Always remember this. You cannot control things like the weather and the outside world but you can control how you react to it. Why let the weather dictate how you feel when you have no control over it.

Exercise, breathing, posture- your body and mind are inextricably linked. So if you learn to control your breathing it can relax you when you feel nervous or lacking confidence. Take deep breaths. Also regular exercise can help you become a more confident. Remember the old saying ‘A healthly body makes a healthy mind.’

Play videos in your head- you’re the star of the show! If you frequently envisage yourself achieving your goals and being a more confident person you can do this playing this in your mind regularly. Soon it can become a reality.

My dear friend I sincerely hope that you found the above tips useful and make some improvement in your life. But there’s so much more I want to share with you. I am passionate about helping you Better Confidence and Self Esteem.

To fulfill your potential, to be the person you always wanted to be and achieve your dreams then I invite you to the Ultimate Guide in Self Confidence. http://www.selfesteemconfidence.info You deserve it! Best wishes to you and your future!

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Many people feel like they can`t handle their anger. They know that when they get upset or have a reaction to something, that it could have been better handled. Poor anger management skills can affect the way other people see you, how other people feel around you and how you feel about yourself. There are many reasons why learning healthy coping skills can improve your life.

When a child is angry, they are given instructions on what to do. For example; a teacher might say `count to ten`, stop and plan, or have a time out. The same skills can be applied to adults who are in need of some management techniques. Getting angry at three or thirty can have the same feelings associated with it; rise in blood pressure, flushed cheeks, pumping heart and a general feeling of anger. So it only makes sense that the same rules would apply.

There are plenty of situations that are going to occur in your lifetime, that are going to boil your blood. Take for example; the slow driver ahead of you, or the person who can`t see over the steering wheel who cuts you off, or it could be a sales person who makes a rude remark, a kid who scratches your car with a rock, a flooded washing machine…the list could goes on. It is important to remember that these things are to be expected in life and they happen.

When a certain situation arises like a flooded washing machine, you might have initial feelings that are expressed before you really think about them. You might blame someone else to make yourself feel better, or you might think about the money wasted on carpet or the fact that your machine might be broken; all of those initial thoughts might have you feeling like you want to explode with anger. The key is to break down your thoughts into smaller ones.

It is important to acknowledge that you have a valid reason for feeling angry. Try to break down your feelings so that they become a group of smaller ones, instead of one big huge bubble of anger. So in the washer machine situation, you could replace angry thoughts by thinking that you`re not going to raise your blood pressure over something that was out of your control. Blaming someone else doesn`t help matters, carpet can be replaced or cleaned out thoroughly, and the machine can be looked at and fixed. Try to think of things as being fixable.

When you`re angry with other people and you feel like it`s out of control, it`s important to find ways to express your feelings without hurting others. There are times when someone else is going to rattle your bones or your child might push all your buttons. Plan ahead on what you are going to do when those things happen. If an adult is making you mad you could walk away, take a break, vent to a friend before you react with them. If you`re angry at a child, you can walk away as well and try to cool down before you deal with the situation.

Often times just taking a break and a time out to think about feelings and emotions can help you figure them out without getting overly mad. If you know that your initial reaction to things is usually bad, then remove yourself right away so that you can deal with your first thoughts on your own. Getting mad is not good for your body, and it`s not healthy for other people to have to deal with you, especially children and loved ones.

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